To get some good AC I went to the cheap seat movie theater tonight and saw "Step." This is a documentary about a Step dance team at a girls' high school in Baltimore. The film focuses entirely on black girls and women. Recommended.
There’s a great quote from Canha that gets to the heart of what this is about:
I had to think about what I was going to do to show my support for Bruce, for 20 minutes. Even then, I was hesitant to do it. I thought about Colin Kaepernick. It’s like, geez, I love baseball. I want to play baseball. I love my job. I love everything about it. I love this country. I want to be part of this country. But to live in fear, just the fact that I had that small amount of fear, that small amount of hesitation, speaks volumes about that we need more change.Full interview here: A’s Mark Canha speaks out on Bruce Maxwell’s protest and whether others will follow
The A’s have been rebuilding. This is a very young team. But they have lots of confidence. I like their character.
The weather was glorious this morning - sun and mist before we got up and just sunshine after we arose. We went for an early(ish) walk and spent the whole time exclaiming over how beautiful everything is. I was on a high anyway, because the transformation from exhausted to being normal - again - feels miraculous. At least it was only months this time, not years, but I'm still surprised how bad it was in retrospect compared with how bad I recognised it as being at the time. Anyway, it had to be the old medication, because I'm bouncing around now and stayed awake until almost 10pm last night, OMG.
Today I painted my golden rod-dyed silk with a solution of iron sulphate and got green stripes. I am very happy about this. Photos to follow.
And then my actual plans got put aside for a sudden burst of book-weeding. We've been meaning to sort the general fiction paperbacks for an age, and today we made a start. We began with the unsorted ones, squeezed onto two shelves and stacked on the floor in two teetering piles. We wiped off the massive quantities of dust and divided them into keepers and discards. By shelf-space, we discarded about 50%, and sorted a total of 5m of books. My estimate for the remaining task is another 23m. The proportion achieved surprises me, and I'm optimistic about completing the task and improving the room by the end of this year.
I was pleased to find my copy of 1066 And All That in the sorting process. So I reread it for the umpteenth time. Bad news: someone removed all the funny. Perhaps it isn't the real book, and I'll find the funny version later, or perhaps a sense-of-humour bypass is a side-effect of the new drug.
Tendons are healing again, and reasonably quickly.
Getting a horse for Christmas when I was 11. Penny and I were soul-friends and I had so many good times with her. Here is a photo of us the next summer: https://flic.kr/p/63nL6f
2. What's the saddest thing to ever happen to you?
Maybe when my 2 best friends broke up with me when we were 11-ish (6th grade). In therapy, I determined this to be a watershed event for learning to shut down my emotions; and also the ringleader probably sensed something gay about me, and that is why she decided to stop talking to me. Also, the way they did it! They just stopped talking to me one day. I was bewildered more than anything.
3. What's the thing that got you the most angry in your life?
Probably at a therapist. I was about a day or two into a hypo-manic episode (?) after coming out and I thought she could help me. She didn't. I did write about it at the time http://sasha-feather.dreamwidth.org/
I got so angry about the Vivid Con ableism stuff in 2010 that I made myself ill. But, that anger has faded. I don't really feel it anymore.
I didn't get angry a lot before I came out; and then I was angry *all the time*; it seems better now a few years on.
4. What's the most frightening thing to ever happen to you?
Scary situations don't really "happen to me" so much as arise from my anxiety. I have gotten super anxious in totally mundane situations. It seemed like the only way out of the problem was to speak, and I was so anxious I could not speak, so I was stuck and frozen. Also, I didn't know why this was happening. Everyone else seemed to have no problem in these ordinary situations, like speaking to a teacher or knocking on a door. Then having random panic attacks sent me to therapy.
In a more traditional sense of frightening-- there was some scary-to-outsiders stuff with the horses, like getting bucked off. But it never seemed scary to me. Animals are easier than people, and that basic fear is easier to deal with than anxiety.
5. What's the most unbelievable thing to happen to you in your life?
a. Getting scholarships that paid for my college education
b. Getting a horse for Christmas!!!11!1!!!
c. Not realizing I was queer until age mumblety
d. getting facial pain that has no real diagnosis
e. Being on the State Champion poutlry quiz bowl team!
Five New York ballparks built in baseball’s “modern” era, which began early in the 20th century — Hilltop Park (1903-12), the Polo Grounds (1911-63), Ebbets Field (1913-57), Yankee Stadium (1923-2008) and Shea Stadium (1964-2008) — seeded much of the game’s history before being torn down. You can trace that history, and even more than baseball, below.
This morning we went into town to do errands, slowly because the tendons are still recovering from the new boots, but we walked over 2km. Our visit coincided with Daventry's very first Food Festival and, somewhat to our surprise, it wasn't a bad event. There were at least four stalls offering locally brewed craft beers and ciders, so we came home with half a dozen different ciders. We would have bought some samosas and onion bhajis, but we were a little too early. The leaflet we were given for the (relatively new) health food store, has convinced me I've been missing out on something good, so I shall visit that next week.
I deposited the majority of my collection of fabulous shoes at one of the charity shops. It was a sad moment, but I'm hoping I'll stop missing them now they are no longer sitting forlornly on a shelf being all unwearable at me. On the upside, I found that with a 3/4 orthotic, rather than a full length one, I can wear more of the old shoes than anticipated (though, inevitably, the more boring part of the collection).
Our lunch was all planned around the giant, homegrown potatoes J gave me on Thursday. They are big enough that we only needed one between two, and we decided that baking would be the best way to enjoy its unadulterated potatoey deliciousness. We had a couple of different salads too and, oh yes, we might have opened one of those ciders to go with it. Omnomnom.
This afternoon I made havregrynskugler as recommended on twitter by Sofie Hagen. The recipe is dead simple - essentially it's chocolate buttercream with oats. I'm not a fan of buttercream, but the oats (and the Amaretto di Saronno I added) make these satisfyingly chewy balls of chocolatey goodness.
We took our time there, because of my tendons and J's damaged foot, and had tea before we started and lunch after looking round. And then more tea. And we took advantage of the free bus service from the gallery back to the car park. We also talked and talked and talked some more.
It was a bit of a risk going out for the day because it was the first day of my new medication, so I was still suffering from the fatigue that is presumed to be an effect of the old medication, while the impact of the new drug is an unknown quantity. J is, fortunately, well-informed and thoughtful, so between us we managed my tiredness and made sure no plummeting blood sugar levels occurred. And I was still safe to drive home at the end of the day.
Lazy photo of the day - zoomed from the car, without stopping and getting out.
Today has been rather lovely too. For a start it's beautifully sunny, so I have the doors open and washing drying outside.
Son of Boilerman turned up as promised around 8:30am and fixed my boiler whilst being chatty and delightful. While he did that, I pottered around gently and did things that needed doing, but without any frantic plan, which was rather nice.
And then I spotted the chap across the road who had been recommended to me as a potential gardener. So we looked around my jungle, agreed an hourly rate, and I now have a gardener. It seems like a perfect arrangement, as he lives a couple of doors away, is self-employed, and can just pop round when convenient for him. He's quite excited about clearing things back and then formulating a plan, and seems open to encouraging me to get involved.
Then the veg man arrived and once more, as his last delivery, I got to accept lots of free leftovers. It's not as epic as The Week of 18 Avocados, but I've got quite a lot of extra salad stuff, and a small mint mountain (a mint foothill). He turned up just as I was eating blue cheese on toast and thinking that it needed something fresh to complement it - pears and figs will do nicely, thank you.
I was supposed to let Percy out for a wander in his back garden around noon, but I failed at opening the back door. (Inadequate training.) So we went for a short stroll instead. On the way we met Ida, the tiny, super-enthusiatic dog who considers Percy to be her boyfriend. Much licking occurred. Everyone seemed very satisfied by this. On the way back I helped a delivery guy to find the right house and he was enthusiastically appreciative. (No licking occurred.)
In drug news, the new medication is definitely reducing my blood sugar. It's lower today than it has been for about a year. (It might be too effective, but we'll see.) I read up on the side effects of the old drug, pioglitazone, and it looks as though it may well be responsible for my peripheral oedema and weight gain as well as extreme fatigue. I wondered why I was getting oedema when the weather is cool, and obviously I blamed myself for the weight thing.
I don't usually read the side effects info. I used to, but concluded that the lists of possibilities are too all-encompassing to be useful and vague enough to make me paranoid. Now I wonder if that was a mistake, so I've read all the possible side effects of the new drug, alogliptin, which is basically all the same things as the old drug, plus a few more. Hopefully I won't experience any of them this time.
None of the side effects mentioned tendinopathy, but the timing fits...and one of the known side effects is an increase in broken bones, so that might not be wild speculation?
And now I have a whole sunny afternoon to myself with absolutely nothing on the Should Do list and many delightful ideas on the Could Do list.